So my birthfather has been "found." Gayoung and I were trying to be covert and ask our aunts if they could track down any information on him without having to dredge up bad memories for Omma. After contacting old friends and neighbors, they were unable to turn up anything. Turns out, Omma's had his phone number all along. Living now in Pohang, he had apparently cut off all ties with friends from his past to the point that he didn't even inform anyone in their family's hometown of my grandfather's passing a few months ago.
Over bowls of makgeolli, Omma tells me, "My greatest wish is that someday he will meet you face to face and apologize to you. I have his phone number when you're ready."
Trying to decide what my next steps are. When is anyone really ready for something like this?